Counselling & Psychotherapy

Counselling Central London Psychotherapy – Sabotaging Behaviour - Counsellor London Camden Psychotherapist
Self Sabotaging Behaviour

One may not reach the dawn save by the path of the night. Kahlil Gibran

Sabotaging OurseIves, Being Impulsive By becoming familiar with the different facets of our personality, we can explore any ways we may inadvertently sabotage us or others. There may be a punishing side of us that sabotages anything good. Our behaviour can be self-destructive or impulsive. We can act out on others our difficult or unwanted feeIings. What once were minor distractions, maybe overworking, over-indulgence in food, alcohol or the computer, can now dominate, yet our core struggles may remain.

How We Feel About Us Our selfimage & selfbeliefs can go a long way in determining our actions & the responses we get back, e.g. in the realm of relationships, if we don't believe we are lovable, this may be elusive (see also Elusive Love?). We may struggle to accept aspects of us we do not like or have difficulty finding our way through, or managing our uncomfortable emotions. Sometimes our selfsabotaging behaviour may be testing someone for their love & approval, no matter how we behave. We may end up sabotaging our relationship. These issues can be explored in counselling & psychotherapy.

Fear Of Success We can not only be afraid of failure, but also of success. Success for some can be threatening, and we can sometimes put things off for fear of succeeding. We may not know how to be OK with this in ourseIf & with others. It can sometimes adversely affect our selfesteem. Some of us may have difficulty in coping with the challenges of succeeding or enjoying achievements, because of our beliefs & selfimage. How we respond to our successes with others can be a challenge for some if we allow our selfdestructiveness to take over. We may fear how others respond to us (e.g. possible humiliation, lack of approval) and our relationships changing for the worse. If we are successful we may believe we won't be liked as much. FeeIings we may not like or be aware of like envy & jealousy may also play a role in how we sabotage things. The counselling & psychotherapy can explore these & other issues with you.

Confirming Our Expectations When living is difficult, we can sabotage things, and make them worse. Some of us can do the opposite - sabotage things when all seems to be going well. For some of us it can also be just painful if we feeI good about us. It's as if we believe things aren't supposed to go well for us - we should feel bad.

When something goes wrong
I'm the first to admit it
I'm the first to admit it
And the last one to know

When something goes right
Well it’s likely to lose me, mm
It's apt to confuse me
It's such an unusual sight
Oh, I can't, I can't get used to something so right
Something so right Paul Simon "Something's So Right"

Not Sure How To Stop Some of us can even notice doing things we would rather not do, yet can't seem to stop. The therapy can look at this with you.

Counselling & Psychotherapy can explore ways of slowing down, our inner beliefs, how we may have abandoned or neglected us & ways of breaking free from any self-sabotaging behaviour (including any unwanted habits or addictions), exploring how you may look after yourself differently. Counselling & psychotherapy may therefore look at ways of reducing dramas we create, by becoming aware of the consequences of our behaviours, actions & thoughts. The therapy may look at how you can have control over your actions, reactions, & interactions, especially those almost automatic responses. We may also explore the impact of your past & look at what you learnt as a child about suffering & joy.